Jesse’s Grill: Where Can I Find a Burger Like That?

BUCK: Joined now by our friend syndicated radio host on Premiere Networks of the Jesse Kelly Show, Mr. Jesse Kelly is with us now. Sir, how are you?

KELLY: Well, I’ve been better, Buck. I mean, life is good. Don’t get me wrong. Show’s good, family’s good, but I have these friends, one friend in particular, he goes by the name of Clay. I found out that he went on the biggest radio show in the country — his show, your show and his show — and he besmirched the world-famous Jesse Kelly cheeseburgers last week, so I gotta be honest. I’m feeling a little bit betrayed and hurt, by the way.

CLAY: It’s true. It’s true!

BUCK: Clay called him out, and I said we’re gonna have you back to address. We will put a pit in that — one of those little toothpicks, if you will — and put that to the side, Jesse, we’ll come back to it ’cause we’re also gonna put your best burger in the history of the world recipe up at ClayAndBuck.com so our audience can try for themselves and then we will let the people speak on this. But that’s coming up. First, though, Jesse, earlier this week — and we were talking to Producer Greg, who does a lot of our call screening and pulling a lot of the audio for the show.

We could have done a show for basically all three hours just taking calls from National Guard or former National Guard, recently former National Guard who are losing or have lost their position, serving United States, because they don’t want to get boosters now, it turns out. You served in the United States Marine Corps. What’s going on here?

KELLY: Well, it’s brilliant, to be honest with you, Buck, it’s brilliant by the communists. One, that the National Guard thing, kicking people out for the vaccine, which is what they’re doing, they’re taking away their pay and whatnot as you guys covered, that’s a hard purge. That’s the Biden administration purging the military as they want to do of their political opponents. That’s the same thing communists had done throughout history.

That’s exactly what they’re doing here. It’s a brilliant way to do it ’cause you can sell it as the public health. Now, the second part of it is the soft purge — it’s what I call a soft purge — of the military. They are taking the super studs who are in — and there are many of them. I’m sure they’re listening to the sound of your voices and my voice right now. They don’t want to shower with transgenders. They don’t want to hear about how evil white people are. They don’t want to find out they should paint their nails and use their pronouns.

And they’re going to get out. They’re gonna take all these years of knowledge they have — and these are our real war fighters, they’re getting out. They’re gonna go do something else, ’cause these are talented people with options. And then the second part of that soft purge is that super stud 16-, 17-year-old kid on the high school wrestling team, he’s been hunting since he’s old enough to walk, the guy who wins wars for you? He’s not joining this military. I hear this all the time from actually traditional military families. I know you guys hear this too. “My dad served, my grandpa served, my uncle, my 10 uncles, and I’m not.” We’re breaking a string now of military service, and these are the people who lead militaries. We are watching the destruction of the U.S. military in front of our eyes. It’s maddening.

CLAY: How do we fix it? I think there’s a huge majority of people out there that have the sense that our country is on the wrong track. In fact, the most recent data reflects that something like 10% of Americans like the direction that our country is on. In your mind, how do you fix the disastrous direction that we are currently headed?

KELLY: Well, see, this is a hard question to answer, Clay, because there are two different answers. There’s the answer, truth, the one that your audience will nod in agreement and know it’s true, but then there’s the normal general public, and the solutions will be too radical for them. How would you fix the military, how should you fix the military? The next person who gets in as president of the United States of America should fire every single officer above the rank of 06 — and I do mean every single one of them.

Then walk on the campus of all three military academies and fire every single employee, every professor, every general, every colonel, you find the parking lot attendant and you tell him he’s fired. You have to uproot this kind of poisonous ideological root, and you have to do it in ways that are painful. Now, if you tried to do that — let’s say the next Republican president tries to do that — it would be viewed as insane and radical.

But when it is this deep, when the rot is this deep, the only way to do it is to dig deep and start tearing it all out. But that’s a solution that the general public would find radical. They don’t like the direction, but if you give them solution, they recoil in horror and say, “What are you some nutjob?” No, I’m trying to save the military.

BUCK: Speaking to our friend Jesse Kelly, syndicated host on Premiere radio networks of the Jesse Kelly Show on in the evening time. Should all be checking out his show later on today. Jesse, also you’re somebody who… I was so glad I saw Tucker last night tackle the Dutch farmer situation. And Clay and I have been talking about earlier this week. I want more and more people talking about it. I know you have been on this.

I don’t see this as a, “Oh, it’s a small country in Europe. Why is it important?” First of all, it’s one of the biggest agricultural exporters on the planet, which I didn’t even know until this issue came up, but even beyond that, the notion that for climate change reasons a sophisticated Western, you know, supposedly liberal democracy government would just say, “Okay, farmers, you’re done, too much climate change problem,” that, to me, is a harbinger of things to come.

KELLY: First of all, I think that the Jesse Kelly Show and the Clay and Buck show we should go to Amsterdam to show our support for these Dutch farmers, and we should all spend about a week in Amsterdam celebrating them and their sacrifice. That’s one.

CLAY: (laughing)

KELLY: Two, I think what you’re seeing now is a result, honestly, of covid-19. And this is what I mean. Western governments now, they’re all corrupt and rotted. It’s not just ours. It’s all the Western governments. And during covid-19 they abused people who were supposed to be free in terrible ways. They did. They told you, “You weren’t essential, shut down your business, stand six feet away, show me your papers, you’re not allowed to eat here,” and the, quote, “free people of the West,” they agreed. Now, maybe… I know you guys personally didn’t. Your audience probably didn’t.

But in general, they agreed. Well, after that Western governments have now figured out, they don’t have to wait for the public to consent to government — gigantic government — action anymore. Governments, Western governments looked at how the public complied and they said, “Okay, I don’t have to wait to push through my climate change insanity anymore. I don’t have to wait for consent. I’ll just cram it down their throat,” and that’s what they’re doing. We got cops shooting at Dutch farmers over there now. They’re doing to them the same thing they did to the Canadian truckers. This stuff is gonna be more common now, sadly.

CLAY: All right, let’s go back to the cheeseburgers. So I, on Friday, as a part of our July 4th festivities, Buck brought up your cheeseburgers. I said that I believed I had had them, and I thought they were average. I’m paraphrasing here. Now, first question for you. Were the cheeseburgers present at the Ted Cruz event that we attended in Dallas at the sort of postparty event? There were cheeseburgers there. Were these the Jesse Kelly cheeseburgers?

KELLY: No! hose were the crappy hotel sliders.

CLAY: All right.

KELLY: Did you really think those crappy cheeseburgers were mine?

CLAY: All right. Well, then, you know what? I gotta be honest.

KELLY: (laughing)

CLAY: I’m gonna apologize ’cause I have not had the Jesse Kelly cheeseburger then. I was told… I was told by a member of the Ted Cruz staff, “You need to have this cheeseburger. This is Jesse’s special cheeseburger.” I had it. I thought it was totally mediocre, and I hadn’t really thought about it since, and then we were talking about the cheeseburger, it occurred to me that I’d had one, according to the Ted Cruz staff.

KELLY: (laughing)

CLAY: So I’m gonna throw the Cruz staff under the bus here because they led me astray into taking a shot at your cheeseburger on last Friday. I have not had one.

BUCK: We’re gonna have to invite the senator to join the taste test when we actually make some Jesse Kelly cheeseburgers, I think is how we’re gonna solve this.

CLAY: We’re getting together in Utah with you, Jesse. Is it possible to have the cheeseburgers in Utah? Do you think that they would have all the condiments and all the things that are necessary next month in order for you to be able to have the Jesse Kelly cheeseburgers present there?

KELLY: I think we’re gonna make that happen or I’m not coming. That’s the bottom line. Now that I know you haven’t even ever had them before, now I have to give them to you and… I mean, I have to give your whole audience how to make them. They are… Generally I’m just obnoxious to be obnoxious but they really are genuinely the best burgers I’ve ever eaten.

BUCK: I mean, that is such a bold statement, but I will say that I have Jesse over the years now — ’cause anyone hears that, they say, “To say you have the best cheeseburger,” it’s almost like people who think, “I’m the best driver.” Like, what does that mean? You don’t get into accidents? How do you judge who has the best cheeseburgers? All cheeseburgers are pretty good. But I’ve seen people that say there’s some special magic to the Jesse Kelly cheeseburger.

So, to that end, we will… Jesse, would you mind sending through… It’ll be written about as the Jesse Kelly Secret to Cheeseburger Perfection on ClayandBuck.com, and we will post it so folks can try it and they can write into us. ‘Cause, you know, your audience loves, and our audience likes you, too, but I feel like they’ll be a little down to the nuts and bolts of how good this cheeseburger really is.

CLAY: I also… I’m gonna throw this out to Senator Ted Cruz’s staff. They may have to fire a staffer.

KELLY: (laughing)

CLAY: I’m not telling you what you should do, Jesse, but if I made a big deal about how good my cheeseburgers were and then there was a staffer walking around telling people they had to eat them because they were the famous Jesse Kelly cheeseburger, and it’s just a random hotel cheeseburger? I’m not telling you how to do your job, but I would be on the warpath.

BUCK: This might be a Beto O’Rourke staffer false flag now. I’m starting to think, you know, trying to seed dissension or seed —

CLAY: It’s possible! It’s possible they were trying to divide us. I don’t know. Maybe there’s a mole. Maybe Cruz has got an employee who is really anti-Jesse Kelly and he’s trying to seed disunion, discord without even anybody being aware.

KELLY: We’ve got a saboteur. Look, I will say to your audience when they go to ClayAndBuck.com and they see the recipe, you’ll see Chipotle Tabasco sauce on there. Just understand this: That is the star of the show. Use a gargantuan amount of it! The second you think you’ve used too much, pour more into it. So go enjoy the greatest burgers ever.

BUCK: Jesse Kelly, everybody. Check out the Jesse Kelly Show later on today, Premiere radio networks all across the country. Mr. Jesse, good to talk to you, sir. We’ll talk to you soon, we’ll have some burgers soon.

KELLY: Be good, boys.