What’s a Biromantic Asexual?

CLAY: All this Disney — I don’t even know what you would call it — like, sort of ritualized humiliation of their CEO with all of these crazy different terms that we don’t even know being tossed out. So, this is Disney executive producer Latoya Raveneau, who said that she is a “biromantic asexual.” That’s how she defines herself. Listen to this as she discusses the challenges at Disney of being a biromantic asexual.

BUCK: I don’t… I don’t know.

CLAY: You’re a single guy. Can you imagine if you had to date a… So, we’re trying to figure out exactly what this is. A biromantic asexual is like the friend zone forever.

BUCK: I was gonna say, “If a woman tells you on a date that she is, at the end of the date, she’s like, ‘Just so you know, I’m romantic but asexual,’ you’re probably not doing as well as you thought you were as a guy in that situation.”

CLAY: It sounds like the worst date ever!

BUCK: Your friend zone forever.

CLAY: Friend zone forever. Not only friend zone! Responsible for all of the romance and you get none of the sex. And, by the way, you’re also competing in the romance field with women and men. First of all, who signs up for these relationships? I can’t think of anything worse than being perpetually friend zoned as the goal of the relationship.

It’s not like, “Hey, I’m just not that interested in you but maybe one day down the line I could be interested in you,” which is the friend zone dichotomy, the difficult spot to be. This is forever. “I just want you to spend money and take me out to dinner and wine and dine me, but I have no interest at all in any sort of intimate relationship with you ever.” Buck, how are these people exist?

BUCK: So I guess if you’re a bisexual aromantic… I’m sorry. (laughing)

CLAY: (laughing)

BUCK: No, no. Biromantic… I just messed it up again!

CLAY: Something I’ve heard of.

BUCK: Well, I guess there probably are some bisexual aromantics. That’s a whole other. But if you’re a biromantic asexual, then that would mean that you’re happy to have, like, dates with people and think that they’re just dreamy but, like, everyone’s going home separately, you know what I mean? That’s the situation, I think. Right? Am I missing something?

CLAY: Yeah, I think that’s right. The awkward, like, kiss or don’t kiss scenario isn’t even in play, which makes me wonder: Who are these people that are actually that and are, like, bragging about it.

BUCK: Uh, Clay? Uh, you’ve been married, what, 15 years now, man? The awkward end-of-night hug —

CLAY: Eighteen years.

BUCK: So, 18 years? The awkward, end-of-night hug? You’re lucky you don’t have to deal with that, my friend.

CLAY: There’s a lot of married people who have been like, “Hey, I’ve been in an asexual relationship for a long time.”